Friday, September 21, 2007

A huge night

Tonight was a huge night for Erin and me. We met with a potential birth-mom for a possible adoption. We've known about this mom for about three weeks and everything has been moving quickly. The first thing we did was design our adoption profile, which must've impressed the mom because she wanted to talk with us. I told Erin that I don't know if this is the right thing or not (still don't know yet) but we should do as much exploring as possible.

We talked with an adoption lawyer and an adoption social worker over the past week. Both people helped us sort through some issues, answered some questions and gave us a good picture of the road ahead should we choose to pursue the adoption. But both said that the most important step is to meet with the mother, if there's "chemistry" between us we can continue to build the relationship.

So we met for dinner tonight and then went to a park and I'd say there was some chemistry. The mom seemed to trust us and we could tell how much she cares for this unborn baby. It was kind of awkward for the first 15 minutes until the mom announced, "I'm kind of nervous." Which we assured her we were too and we both loosened up from then on.

We wrote out a list of "easy" questions we'd ask tonight and some "harder" questions for later, but the mom seemed so comfortable that she volunteered some of the harder info we were going to ask later. Erin and I both felt she was being very honest with us. She has been hooked on drugs but she's been through rehab, still goes to NA and has been clean for a year and a half. To say this girl has had a tough life would be an understatement. After her dad died, her family moved from Mississippi to Kansas when she was 13. She was abused by her uncle and her mom has rejected her bi-racial daughter. She's living on state assistance and is home with her 18 month old daughter all day. She can't work because she has cervical cancer and pancreatis. She's had to stop chemo with the pregnancy and is worried that the cancer will come back in force after the pregnancy. I felt like crying as she told me all of this. How can someone get kicked by life so many times?

I'm going to go on another fast because I'm not sure what to do. I''m in desperate need of God's guidance.

The baby is due March 14th and she thinks its going to be a boy.

1 comment:

Derin Beechner (Durk Niblick) said...

Thanks for sharing and being honest with us.